I started The Homesickness Series one year ago, promising to write three articles on the subject. The first was how to cope with homesickness when the future looks uncertain and the second was a guide for friends and partners wanting to support loved ones who are missing home. The third piece, how to turn your house into a home, took me a while — a year to be precise.

It took so long because firstly, life got in the way, and secondly, because I liken my inspiration to an orchid that blooms, dies, disappears for months and then reappears suddenly and boldly on a random Wednesday.

One year since The Homesickness Series and almost two years since I moved to the UK, I can now say that I feel order. My new house resembles a home and dare I say, feels like one too. It didn’t at the start. It didn’t for a while, actually. From experience, I have found that it takes a year and a half to get accustomed to a new place. It takes almost two years for the dust to settle. It might sound like a lot and it certainly can feel like it at times, but it is surprisingly little when you look at it in retrospect.

If you are at the start of this journey, I hope I can lend some advice that helps you turn your house into a home.

THE BIG THINGS

Since furnishing an entire flat is (unsurprisingly) expensive, this step alone can take a year (or longer). If you are like me and you want to speed up this process, I strongly suggest you consider charity shops or antique markets. The pieces you will find will undoubtedly be unique, have an interesting story, and cost about 70% less than new items in stores.

When picking furniture, I also recommend choosing items that speak to you — and what speaks to you will not speak to others (even you might not know why it speaks to you). For example, I bought an old dining table made of sturdy pine wood; I only later realised that that it was almost identical to the kitchen table my family had over twenty years ago.

the little things

When you have your furniture and your house no longer looks empty, it is time to focus on the little things so it does not feel empty. I put up the fairy lights I’ve had since university and went on a hunt for candles and lamps that meant I could turn off the big bright light which made my house feel more like an office than a home and have more ambient lighting.

Another thing I did was ask my family for a small present: I asked if they could buy me the same set of teacups I used to drink from ‘back home’. They did and it made the world of a difference.

Merging your worlds

There will always be things that are not good enough in your new country or were better back ‘home’ (and vice versa). But, comparison is the thief of joy and keeping score will not make you feel more at home.

Truthfully, I believe the answer lies in merging your worlds. Just because you are no longer living in your home country does not mean you should feel disconnected from it. And feeling connected to it can be easily done at home.

You can have photographs from your home country displayed around the house, frame a personalised map print of the two countries so you can see this merge, cook national food so that the scent fills your home, and follow your traditions. (Sharing these traditions with others can also bring you joy.)

It’s about making your house feel like home, even if the outside world still feels foreign so that when you walk in and you sit down and you make yourself a cup of tea, you feel at peace.

You can make yourself feel safe and at peace at home. The rest will follow.